Some thoughts for women, no offence guys

1)千萬別幻想你可以改換男性的個性，你只能更換的，是他在做嬰兒時的尿布。

Don’t ever think that you could change a man, you could only change him when he is still wearing diapers.

2)當你的男朋友離家出走時，你能做些甚麼？把大門關上，永遠別讓他來。

When your guy leave you, what would you do? Close the door and never let him in again.

3)要找男人，隨便找一個好了，別分年輕的或老的，他們都是一樣，他們不會成熟。

When you’re looking for a man, just grab anyone that you can find, don’t see the age, they are just the same, INMATURE!

4)所有男人都是一樣，只是臉不同，方便你認出他是張三李四罷了。

Every man is just the same, their face is different just for us to recognise who is Robert or Sam.

5)不必把男人當傻瓜，他們本身已經是一個傻瓜。

Don’t think that guys are silly, because they are silly.

6)猶太人的子孫在沙漠浪蕩了四十年，可想而知，甚至在《聖經》的舊時代，男人已經沒有甚麼方向感。

Men has no sense of direction.(As in making decisions)

7)有幽默女人，不是會說笑話的女人。是聽了男人講話時，笑得出的女人。

Women with sense of humor doesn’t mean they know how to joke, it’s when they hear the men talking, they laugh.

8)當你的男人上司向你說：「你看來一點也不太忙嘛。」你儘管回答：「那是因為我每辦一件事，一辦就辦妥了。

When you male boss says :”you don’t seem that busy eh?” You can just answer him :” it’s because when i do things, i get things done!”

9)如果男人問你：「你的電話幾號？」你儘管回答：「要是我告訴你，我就要換新號碼了。」
如果男人問你：「你住在哪？」你儘管回答：「要是我告訴你，我非搬家不可！」

If a man ask for your number, you could just answer him:” if I give you my number, i would have to change number by then.”

If a man ask where do you live, you could just answer him:” if I give you my address, I would have to move out!”

10)如果男人問你：「你想念我嗎？」你儘管回答：「你不消失，我怎會想念你？」

If a man ask you :” do you miss me?” you could answer :” if you don’t go away, how can i miss you?”

11)如果男人要求：「把我的早餐拿到上來吃。」你儘管回答：「那你去廚房睡覺好了。」

If a man ask for bed in breakfast, you could just tell him :why don’t you sleep in the kitchen then?”

12)如果男人問你關於書本的事：「你最喜歡看的是哪一部（簿）？」你儘管回答：「支票簿。」

If a man ask you bout a book :”which book do you like the most?” you can answer him :” cheque book.”

13)如果要叫男人做一件事，最好的辦法是向他說：「這件事你做不動，你太老了。」

If a man order you to do something the best way to answer him is :” If you can’t even do this, then you’re too old.”